I know a lot of cassies feel almost lost their hope now..
I'm listening BoA - Be With You. I know this song after watch 10 promises to my dog movie. It's really a good movie about promise a girl make to her dog. I can't stop crying since the movie started until the end, and also because I miss my dogs so much and think about some of my dogs that has died. T.T
Everytime I hear that song, I'm gonna cry. This evening, I feel so hopeless like i told above, after saw their pictures in Japan that looked so awkward and like they're ENEMY now. Changmin doesn't usually stand far from jae and closer with yunnie? he usually loves to play with jae and stay closer with him.
So... If this continue like this, it will make cassiopeia hurt and also them.
I know this is stupid when I still want to keeping our FAITH, when almost all cassiopeias have already got over it and just ready to hear their' DISBANDED. So, I don't know my feeling yet now. It seems that I'm so egoist? I want make them happy,so if it's really their decision, I will just approve it. But, deepest inside in my heart, I don't want to approve that.
I just cannot let my dream just go away because I haven't fulfilled it yet like my other friends. I haven't meet them in REAL, watching them singing, dancing, and adoring them without even in a blink when they're singing, screaming their name, and crying because I will see them to make my wish come true. I don't know who else I will blame to? my father? of course nope...
It's my mistake. Why I never try harder to see them until their last...??
There are a lot of good memories about TVXQ and ME. I know it's just about a usual fangirling, but it's different for me. They changed, taught, cheered, and be with me if I feel so depressed. Their song, video, act, and others who always accompany me since I know them when even my best friends and my parents can't make it.
Back agai, "Be with u" by boa, I keep listening to that now. I love the lyrics that tell about the promises and we have to count every moment we're together. I already do that to them as if they're really there in my life. Most of the time I hear their song, I always remember when, where, and what time I was doing when I knew that song for the first time or when I did something really precious.
Like you're beautiful, Trick, all that song in TRICK album, when I was still be together with my friends still very active in TI, making and reading our FF together, gathering and talking about TVXQ for sure.
About the sad time, there's also like miduhyo when my friend comma and passed away in 2 weeks, tho she's not a close friend, but she's a good friend.
I still want to talk a lot about it, but I just try not to tell all about, because I don't want have puffy eyes of crying a lot. I just want to still hoping when i can, but I will not force them to not disband. I just pray to god to make the best choice.
T_____T have to ready to say goodbye?should I?
try ti think of them now when listening to be with u song by boa.. I'm sure u will have a good time and express all ur feelings out, and don't forget to read know the lyrics before, so u can understand, not tvxq song!
tvxq's song just will make us..... yea u know it.. ;_;
*looking at the title* remind me of RANDOM bambi a.k.a Laurong.haha..XD
long time no edit my blog~ckck..as I expected, it will took a long time to update my blog.
I've been busy with homework and jdrama, kdrama.haha.. I just finish watch shining inheritance, tho it's not new drama, but i watch it because of han hyojoo.xD. Her acting is good, and I like her.hehe.. So, I don't hate it because she was being casted with jaejoong's.XD. it's not like seeing yunho and ara, yunara couple..cihh..=3=..I don't like them!!
I just finished eating kimchi from daejangkeun last sunday..haha..and it's not a good day for me, cuz of my feelings and my cousin also..I hate myself at that time..><. Actually, i want to take a picture, but for wut?haha..
another thing,,I have A LOT OF HOMEWORKS to do!!agghhh!!T3T..huhu..ottohkeee...>3<
ahh..I talked with my korean girl in my class today, and she said that she doesn't really have a real idol, and not into 1 singer. but, she likes bigbang better..;_;. It seems that korean girl whose age r the same average as me usually like bigbang and not really into kpop?i'm curious..lol. or maybe just some of them who came here is like that, not like a lot of hardcore fans in korea?
whatever then..X3
Yesterday, I got 2 shocking day which means from my 2 friend. That made me shock because, it seems suddenly and i still not ready yet.haha.. I know it nonsense cuz it's not really important if u know what it is!XD. i can't tell a lot now,, my mind's starting have a lot of thoughts..because i hv a lot of thing to write, but I don't know what..= = and why..
aigoo~ so, i juz finish it.. i hope i can update my blog everyday, at least once in 2 days.nyiehnyieh..*min's smirk
Secondly, I MISS CHANGMIN SO BADLY~ I dont know what to do, and I really wanna do spazzing about MINNIE NOW! but, it seems nobody interested about it or about changminnie. because sometimes I feel everyone just ignore him, especially about the couple matters,,they always discuss about the others, but so rare couple who has MINNIE there..
agghhh... I am not angry but I feel so sad and crying so badly yesterday night.. I immediately went to my bedroom to crying, because outside, there're my cousins.. I can't tell that I cried because of some useless matters right?><
I just hope the best for changmin about his new drama that has a rumor it will be take place in aussie, and I HOPE IT GONNA BE HERE! PERTH FTW!!! XD. When I imagined if it came true, I can
't hold my tears anymore..:p.yeahhh..like usual, crying crying crying!! crying make me better! it's my hobby and because I'm a cry-baby in bambi family, nee?
huhuhu.. and just now, when I woke up in the morning, my head felt a bit hurt and so confuse, maybe it's because I cried so badly yesterday night. then, my grandma made me who already in badmood become worse, she talked bad about my parents..I know she just want to tell me not to be like them in their bad personalities. it's not too bad, but it's just for the culture of chinese or else..whatever.. = =..
Then, just now I saw a not very good news about dbsk's lawsuit, with the title
[NEWS] TVXQ is one step closer to breaking up? <-- this absolutely make me shivering and feel worsee!!!
The three members of TVXQ who have taken legal action against SM Entertainment are planning to work by themselves, according to their legal counsel.
When Sports Seoul asked the three members' legal counsel about SME demanding the three members to make a decision by the 12th, they were told:
"The three members are taking a break at the moment and are planning new projects. We do not plan on responding to SME's press conference. SME was ordered by the court to submit relevant evidences and they have been ignoring this order for almost 3 months now and they also have not been following any other court orders. Conversations with SME will start when they start respecting the court's decision. The court said that the three members may work on their own, so we do not need SME's permission on that. We are also seriously considering making criminal accusations against SME."
The three members are now planning their own projects separate from that of the five-member TVXQ and in no way related to SME. They also do not intend on responding to SME's demand for an answer by the 12th.
source: nate
credit: delacroix@allkpop
Shared by: DBSKnights
^ what the hell is that??huhuhu..T___T.. I know that it might not be true, since its from allkpop!
but what I hate the most is when I saw allkpop post this news on fb, 6 people like this news!! DAMMIT!
If I knew who are them, I gonna kill them immediately!!!!!! and tutored them first!!!T__T
God, please help me to control my feeling.. I don't want to keep like this...
I am listening to Love is...by TVXQ~ although it's not sad but why this suits me to cry now with my teary eyes that I try to hold it in order not to drop those!!i dont want to make my cousins and grandma worry!>.< and tell my father.. they will think I'm suffering living like this now, living far away from my parents and can't study at all. but IT'S NOT BECAUSE OF THAT!
BTW, I just smile when saw this pictures,=). this is so damn cute and funny with my teary eyes of course because I miss him and them so muchh... 2 hyung who made a fun of their sleepless dongsaeng.
=============================================
Whatever the problems, now I feel so sad and bad..;_;.
I dunno what are the exactly reasons. But, I'll try to write those here.
Firstly, it is because my friends who are in bandung, I just want to write honestly, because since yesterday me and my bambi family had started to talk about it spontaneously in order to make them REALIZE!
They held a gathering called TVXQ gathering rite? they said in fb, they ask everyone to sing dbsk's song, but where?where is their promise? They sing 2pm, kara, snsd, bigbang & etc! wut the hell is dat?!TT_TT. they sang it happily, but when my friend change the song into dbsk's song, they just bored to death and their faces all look so tired!
I know it just a NONSENSE, but now DBSK is in problem, you know??with thew lawsuit blablabla!!and I feel wanna support them with a past memory and sing their songs together!! is it because now they are in breaktime and even dangerous time, all of u just be ignorant like that? how can you say keep the faith until now? how can u say u love them forever?
I feel wanna cry so badly..It feels like what happen to you guys???
When I was still in bandung and together with them, I always bring my cd that has all about dbsk! we sing it happily and I also didn't forgot to bring the lyric! At that time also, sometimes they talk about the other kpop singer happily and ask me to have bigbang,snsd, and WG mv/songs for karaoke. When they started to sing it, they all look so HAPPY,GLAD & PLEASED. 2 or 3 of my friend and I just sat on the back and watching them because I didn't remember all those songs beside TVXQ!!!
But I think it's okay since they sing dbsk's song more than those.
and now... it become worse!!= =... it's not tvxq gathering! it's kpop gathering!!
and still some of members or even staff said that dbsk's song is boring and will not satisfied if not sing the other songs!
OK?! ENOUGH!! I wish I was there so I can make an act to that! poor some of my friends who suffered at that time..T3T
I'm so happy these days!!XD. My AADB3 has came!!huahuahua.. Time goes fast, it seems I'm still waiting for it now, but I almost finish all dvds!XD. My favourite cut is when JaeMin and yoomin playing together, especially jaemin, I often saw their moment lately..keke..they're so cute together and look like so close like brothers~! it's different like jaechun, they look like forever best friend.XD.
anyway~ juz wanna share my lovely aadb3 and bvlgari perfume from my grandma! Thanks to her, tho I feel bad for it..><. because it looked like I used her to pay it for me..T3T.huhu..because I'm saving my money now.. i can't afford to buy that perfume!it's chunnie's! I already bought kenzo, minnie's perfume in indo, and i want try these when it's on discount from 80 bcome 50. mianhaeeeee halmonniii..jongmall..jinjaaa..huhu... I will not dissapointed u from now!!!><
sorry god..;_;
thanks for today..=)
omg~ like i expected before, i will be so lazy to update my blog. Actually I want to write my daily life, but my hands seem so lazy to type up.lol. I just wanna share 2 weeks ago photo when I had a sel group in my friend house every friday night. I am so happy because I can meet quiet a lot of indonesian.huahua.. because lately, I feel lonely..T3T. My design class has a lot of malaysian, and chinese but not indonesian..huhu..i feel a bit lonely for sure. I thanked to my friend, linh who is vietnamese and she ask her indonesian friend, aldys went to play ice skatting together last month, so i can know about catholic church and catholic indonesian friends.lol. *my english is getting worse.
for this week,, I can't go to sel aither church, because my grandma and auntie ask me to go together to have a dimsum and dinner at tony romas. today, we just went back from tony romas, before, i didn't want to go!but, they said I must go! I have to spent my time with them because they're still here now..><. Of course I am happy, but I don't know my other feelings that still bother me..><
jesslyn,vero,linda,me~the others were busy at something.lol
picture taken by robin.=)
